That’s What Wives Are For…
Super Sexist Vintage Ads

People who don’t believe that sexism towards women exists are like people who believe in creationism – you have to ignore all context and history in order to make the case for one of these ludicrous claims. Sexism today may be muted and far more subtle, but that’s because the foundation was laid in my great-grandmother’s generation and her great-grandmother’s generation. Centuries of brainwashing have created a world where women have learned to listen to a little man who lives in their heads, one who constantly judges their appearance before anyone sees them and their words before they even leave their mouths. My great-great-grandfathers made sure that women knew what their place was, and gave them role models in print advertising and on TV to look up to and be inspired by – self-conscious, obedient, insipid and stupid women. My personal favorite ad is for the “Unspeakables,” a product made to catch “Milady’s foul drippings during her less dainty time of the month,” and which looks like a fucking brick in the picture. How my foremothers managed their way through a world that flat-out told them that their sex made them worthy victims of beatings and murder is amazing to me. They flipped through pages of magazines that told them to douche themselves with Lysol after they finished bleaching their entire house in order to keep their husbands – and somehow, they persevered to produce a generation of women who can work alongside their husbands and don’t have to disinfect their vaginas with household cleaners any more. Anyone who denies the power of telling a person their whole life – and not just for their lifetime, but for the lifetimes of their daughters and granddaughters – that they are less than in every possible way, is a fucking idiot. Ask the CIA, they use these techniques all the time! Check out a collection of hilarious and sad sexist vintage ads below…