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The Kama Sutra For Skaters

What’s the one thing that’s better than skateboarding? You guessed it, sex. So why keep these things separate? Why not mix that deck that you love to play with with that dick you also love to play with? In an effort to spice up your sex life and your skate life, we came up with a few new positions for you and your lover (of whatever gender) to try out. Now you can fornicate on a Foundation board, fool around on a 5boro, or copulate on a Cliche. If all goes according to plan you may even need to pick up a Plan B pill so you don’t spawn the next Knox Godoy.

This Story was pinched from our comrades over at JenkemMag

fly

“THE TRAVELING MISSIONARY” AKA “COME FLY WITH ME”

Whether they admit it or not, everyone likes missionary. It’s a world classic. It’s like the ollie of sex. Once you’ve mastered the ollie you can go further into the skate world, similarly, once you’ve mastered missionary you can move onto other positions, you know, like anal sex and double penetration. The traveling missionary adds a new twist to an old favorite by allowing you and your lover to explore missionary in every part of your home, rolling to each room fucking in the oldest position in the book. After trying this it will be your “mission” to tell people about this refreshing take on an old way to bone. Your pleasure levels will be flying high and bodily fluid will be flying by.

 

waterboard

 

“THE WATER BOARD”

Oral sex has never been so criminal! Inspired by the torture methods on prisoners from Guantanamo Bay, the waterboard uses the combination of knee strength and genital asphyxiation for a wild oral experience fun for both teams. Whoever will be munching on genitalia will lie down with their back on the skateboard while the receiver stands above the muncher. The receiver will kneel down (almost as if they’re gonna take a dump on their partner) and suffocate the muncher with their privates until they have given up vital information. Once they’ve got all the info and all fluids out it’s time to switch positions and make sure everyone gets some waterboard treatment.
washer3

 

“THE FULL SERVICE CLEANER”

Think of the “Full Service Cleaner” as the more modern, more liberal version of “The Waterboard”. It switches the power roles, giving more dominance to the person on the skateboard and incorporates one of todays biggests modern sex crazes, ass eating! Like the “Waterboard” the receiver will stand above the muncher but instead of suffocating the muncher, the standing receiver will be at demand of the muncher who will use the skateboard to move back and forth so that they can be able to reach every inch of their lover as well as tell the receiver to get lower or higher. This one will quickly become a favorite in your household and your non-skateboarding lover will start to demand that you always have the best bearings on deck.

 

wallridesex1

 

“THE ROLLER DOGGY TO FRONTSIDE WALLRIDE”

This is a play on the infamous doggy style and is for those true “dirty dogs”. Once you’ve convinced your lover to let you penetrate them, bust out the widest board you have and tell your lover it’s time for “roller doggy”. Place them on the board on their knees, bent over, butt facing towards you, like normal doggy, but utilizing the board to roll them back and forth towards you giving you both that nice stroke. Your “bitch” will be loving it too! If you and your lover are real adventurous, before you climax push them against and up the wall and ride them out for an unforgettable wallride “ender”.

 

Read The Rest of the Radical Feature Over At JenkemMag

 

28 Comments

28 Comments

  1. Lucy Westerna

    February 18, 2016 at 1:43 pm

    Tomas Mosqueda camasutra con skate

  2. Krishtie Mofazzal

    February 18, 2016 at 12:33 am

    Jade O’Donnell

  3. Simone Davidson

    February 17, 2016 at 2:04 pm

    Jake Solberg 😂😂😂😂😂😂 I’m dying 😭

  4. Chris Hernandez

    February 17, 2016 at 1:59 pm

    She said no to a backside shove it

  5. Andrew M Sommer

    February 17, 2016 at 12:30 pm

    Preston Pasco

  6. Christopher Owens

    February 17, 2016 at 11:29 am

    Miles Scott, Ian Pearce

  7. Elissaveta Bitolska

    February 17, 2016 at 10:25 am

    Kleg Oaraganov

  8. Jose Maria Carrasco

    February 17, 2016 at 9:41 am

    Cucudrulu Del Mojave, Sören Nasty Mondays

  9. Korynn Jenna-Sue West

    February 17, 2016 at 9:04 am

    Danny West

  10. Dolly Dagger

    February 17, 2016 at 7:37 am

    Amadeus

  11. Jon McClane

    February 17, 2016 at 6:48 am

    Mario Steiner

  12. Αντώνης Τσιλιγκίρης

    February 17, 2016 at 5:55 am

    χουσεΐν Dorian Kostas

  13. Jack Simms

    February 17, 2016 at 4:25 am

    Hopefully no fakies 😉 Alan, Jason, Alwyn, Niall

    • Alan Campbell

      February 17, 2016 at 4:28 am

      Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase pusshead 😷😂😂😂

  14. Nic V D Merwe

    February 17, 2016 at 4:07 am

    Consanguineous Tyrant Kunene sorry dude but couldn’t resist tagging you lol

  15. Sarun Macabre Prakeetawatin

    February 17, 2016 at 3:42 am

    Natthawut Metinovich Jetatigarn

  16. Nathalie Schenk

    February 17, 2016 at 3:35 am

    Marlin Mulle

  17. Maarten Baum

    February 17, 2016 at 2:48 am

    Angelo, been there done that

  18. Angelo Van de Weerd

    February 17, 2016 at 2:32 am

    Maarten Baum

  19. Lauren Gioe

    February 17, 2016 at 2:11 am

    Nick Marcisin Cassandra Bradshaw

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